The screening part to becoming a surrogate can go many different ways, ie. quick and simple, long and dragging, or slowly but surely. Whichever way it goes you have to trust the process. We do everything we can to make sure things run smoothly with no delays. Sometimes though, the world just has different plans.
December 2019 was a rough month for me, personally. My best friends were all deployed, states away, or had just gotten orders across the country. I was going through a messy divorce. I missed my family. One day, I was talking with one of my friends while she was deployed, she casually mentioned surrogacy, unknowing that I had been considering it for about 8 years. This provided the necessary support and encouragement for me to reach out to Abundant Life Surrogacy. I began my journey in surrogacy. No one could have predicted what 2020 could hold only a few months later. From a global pandemic to murder hornets to protests lasting months, 2020 was a year unlike anything I’ve experienced. It also happens to be possibly my favorite year that I’ve gotten to be alive so far.
Early in my journey I needed to get my IUD removed, for obvious reasons. My appointment was scheduled for March. Excitement raced through my body that I was going to get to be a part of this beautiful process to helping create a family. My appointments kept getting pushed back due to CoVid. Disappointment flooded me. Not willing to give up, I rescheduled, several times. After impatiently waiting for the medical process to clear, a roller coaster of emotions, and approximately the length of one global pandemic, transfer is scheduled!
This journey has taught me a lot about learning to trust the process that the Universe sends my direction and who is here to love me unconditionally. In a twist of events, all of my primary support systems will be gone throughout the majority of my pregnancy (hopefully this baby sticks). Unlike last year, the feeling of loneliness is not present when I think about helping to build this family. I have the most wonderful Intending Parents. My partner-in-crime will be overseas but only a phone call away. Surrogacy sisters are a quick message. My sweet daughter is just across my house.
While there have been some in my family of origin who freely provide their unsupportive and unsolicited opinions, they just further prove to me how beautiful this journey truly is. Helping to build families is not a calling given to many. This beautiful process has made my life fuller and my family complete. It takes a village to raise a child and sometimes it takes a city to grow one.
Family doesn’t have to look like a man and a woman with a white picket fence and a manicured yard with 2.5 kids. Family is a group of people who love you for all your quirks, pick you up when you’re up in your emotions, and sit there laughing at your stupid memes, gifs, and TikToks until your sides hurt. Sometimes your family has blood relations, but more often than that your family is a group of people that you pick because they are the closest embodiment of unconditional love that can be represented on Earth. Surrogacy has helped build families, including my own by working towards giving the gift of parenthood to the most amazing men an entire world away.