FEATURE STORY 0421

This month’s story comes from a surrogate who did not one, but TWO journeys! Each pregnancy, each delivery, each journey will all be different. No two journeys are the same, but the stories are amazing.

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When one thinks of surrogacy it’s a blessing and such a selfless act, but what you don’t think about is the heartache. When I signed up to be a surrogate no one told me of the dark side. My 1st journey was way too fast to really comprehend, it was 11 months from match to the birth of a beautiful little girl and a handsome boy. The pregnancy and delivery were flawless and the babies along with their parents happy.

Fast forward to my 2nd journey where the dark side happens. I was matched with a wonderful IF who wanted to be a dad to a little boy. First transfer was a success, positive pregnancy test. Yay we were pregnant, this is amazing. My daughter and I recorded a video and sent to the dad. He was over the moon excited. My first beta was good then the second one dropped, I was miscarrying. I stopped all meds and let my body do its thing. HOW? WHY? We won’t know why I lost that little boy. What I did know that the IF on the other side of the globe was heart broken yet so positive and so reassuring, my husband and my daughter kept me safe. What a blessing to be surrounded by so much love. I worked with ICRM and we were able to roll right into another transfer. SHOTS SHOTS & MORE SHOTS!!!

Second transfer happens and was successful and another positive pregnancy test and a good beta, but we were all scared, hesitant and nervous. What if it happens again and then it did I was miscarrying another little boy. I cried and was so heartbroken. ICRM let the IF know and then I received the most amazing video message. I could hear the heartache in his voice but the only thing he really cared about was me and how I was doing. I was worried about him. I had the loving arms of my husband and daughter to keep me grounded. I thought oh lord why us, why me… I am a surrogate and this isn’t supposed to happen. This is the tough part, what do we do next? I really thought that I would be dropped and my surrogacy would come to an end. Nope, I was chosen to participate in an experimental biopsy study of my uterus as well as have an ERA done. Matter of fact I had 2 of each done. These were painful and very exhausting. I was ready to give up but my support team was not. The test results came back and we had answers so we moved forward.

Third transfer was here, I was a wreck deep down, what if it happens again. With all the love I could ever ask for our prayers were answered. I felt great and knew this one would be different. Transfer was a success and we had another positive test and a high beta #, yippy it worked. We were all stoked but still nervous. The second beta was real high, then we had heartbeat confirmation. I was able to relax a little, still scared and still nervous. I could feel the love from my IF on the other side of the world. He was so excited. My pregnancy was good with a few exceptions. I had lots of heart burn, indigestion, morning sickness, acid reflux, gestational diabetes and Group B strep. I thrived through the pregnancy taking it one day at a time. I was induced at 39 weeks due to diabetes. It was a different experience, 15 hours later I had a beautiful and oh so healthy baby girl. The look in her daddy’s eyes when he 1st saw his daughter was perfect and such a blessing.

It’s been 5 months since she was born and I reflect on everything that took place in the almost 2 years of trying to get the IF a baby and I am blessed by everything and everyone that was involved. My family and I have the most amazing relationship with them and always will. I still wonder why? Why did it happen, why wasn’t I told about these things that can go wrong and why me. I was chosen to help start a family. It was supposed to be a magical experience. I truly believe everything happens for a reason. I admire his strength and patience and I am forever thankful for my family helping and supporting me through it all. My husband gave me 175 shots over the course of 2 miscarriages, 2 sets of biopsies and 1 healthy pregnancy.

I made 2 families and most of all I grew and learned so much. I hope this helps other surrogates and intended parents. Surrogacy isn’t all flowers and rainbows. We as surrogates are not exempt from complications. We are 1 in 8, as well as we are warriors. BEAUTIFUL ~~ STRONG ~~ SELFLESS

I AM A PROUD SURROGATE

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